Love It To Death

Late at night when the mood gets sexy, do you turn to your lover with a playful wink and an enigmatic smile? Or do you simply say, “The urge to sow my lifeseeds is upon me”?

It’s not exactly romantic (or subtle), but it apparently works—especially if you’re a god-like creature named Prodigion. He’s cruising the Negative Zone on a ship filled with a harem of beautiful heralds looking for planets to “bestow his gifts upon.” In a way he’s the flipside of Galactus. One guy eats planets, and the other guy “distributes the gift of life.”

As the Silver Surfer and Fantastic Four eventually discover, Prodigion’s methods might be different from those of Galactus, but the results are pretty much the same. His mission is to create life, but once introduced into the atmosphere, his “lifeseeds” smother the terrain and snuff out the indigenous environment completely. It’s like a giant-sized celestial bukkake. “What existed there before is of no importance,” his prime herald says dismissively.

Where the Surfer goes, he goes alone. But he always seems to bump into cosmic despots like Galactus, Thanos, and now Prodigion. (Question: has he ever come face-to-face with Darkseid?) The poor guy can’t catch a break. He went to the Negative Zone hoping for a little redemption. What he found was a new Galactus. What rotten luck.

[Fantastic Four: Redemption of the Silver Surfer / By Michael Jan Friedman / First Printing:  June 1997 / ISBN: 9780399142697]

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